Good Workouts and Bad Workouts

I think I'm treading water here - nothing of interest to post.

Yesterday I had one of the weaker workouts I've ever had. It started bad as Dan and I debated doing the stationary bike, climbed on for 4 minutes, then realized that that thing sucks and went back to the elliptical. But due to time constraints, we only did 15 minutes of elliptical work. Then we went to do our chest workout and I felt like we wasted a ton of time in between sets. To top it off, we finished with a seated pec fly routine on a machine, only as it was the first time cycling this exercise into the program, we didn't know what weight to use and ended up going too light, and having a lame overall day.

I ate well yesterday though. Southwest salad, pineapple chunks, a Subway club, a packet of apples, and loads of water with one Diet Coke for good measure.

I hate having a bad workout. I guess you need them so you can tell when you've had a good workout, but bleh.

Today's workout was much better. Great, great elliptical - I was really sweating today. Then we did arms and got a great pump. The preacher curls we slowed down a bit on, but that was the last of four exercises and I'm okay with it.

306.9

Sagging Skin

I'm now just over 27 pounds lost since starting back in mid-July, and one of my bigger concerns is starting to possibly show up.

Month ago, when I'd step out of the shower and grab my towel and towel off, I'd look in the mirror. All my 'stuff' stayed relatively in place. I guess my skin was pretty taught (and as I was adding a pound a month at that point, I was always stretching against it), so it kept me together. But now there's 27 pounds worth of empty space, and when I towel off, my 'stuff' starts to jiggle. And keeps jiggling. lol. It's most pronounced at the bottom of my gut, where the stomach overhangs my waistline. Not only does that area shake quite a bit, but it also seems to have what looks to be little pock marks or hail damage. Not quite cellulite (does that stuff get on your stomach?), but just... I don't know. About a month ago on my forearms (especially the right one) I noticed this kind of... divot? Sure. Divot. I noticed this divot appear on the inside of the forearm. It doesn't correspond to any missing bone or missing muscle, and I assume that as I was losing weight the divot was just one of the first areas that the fat started disappearing from. I know that there's no such thing as spot reduction (you can't do situps to lose fat around the midsection specifically, it just all starts coming off), but I do think that there's probably little spots that will just disappear a bit faster than others as my body gets used to less fat. Or burns it off.

Back on topic. I fear the sagging, loose skin. And I know that some of the people out there reading this have lost 30, 50, 100 and even more pounds. What can you tell me? I've heard rumors about milk helping to tighten the skin, but that sounds to me like a wives' tale. I've also read articles that say that if you're working out, you're filling some of the space back up with muscle and it helps to lessen the issue. I'm not down with much in the way of medical, but I think in this instance I'd opt for the skin removal surgery if it gets bad. Anyone have that? Recommendations?

307.5 btw

Neat.

Got out of the shower today and caught a glimpse of myself - I'm still all big and gross and whatnot, but -BUT- I noticed something. My forearms.

Back when I started my workouts, I turned to my workout partner on arm day. "Forearm curls?" I'd asked him. "Nah," he said. "Forearms take care of themselves." I gave him a derisive snort and went about working the biceps and triceps. Well, it's now been 2.5 months since starting this and guess what - he was right. Somewhere in the preacher curls, reverse curls, tricep pushdowns, bench press, and anything else that uses a strong grip I've worked my forearms. And looking at them in the mirror, I could see... lines. Lines of muscle, twisting up my arms. They disappeared as they got close to the elbow of course - the fat starts really taking over at that point. And only the smallest hint of a tricep/shoulder bulge show at the moment. Those muscles are just buried under pounds and pounds of fat. But where the fat runs thin, where the muscle is close to the skin on my forearms... it's there. The promise of a better, fitter, stronger me.

It will be months and months of work until I see the muscle lines I want - shoulders, pecs, bis, quads, calves. But they're in there, and they're waiting for me. Waiting for me to purge the fat. Waiting to be seen.

Steady Progress

So yay, my cheat day damage is already behind me, which took significantly longer to get behind me last time. So this week I can really focus on my goal of getting below 300 pounds for the first time in, well... who knows how long? I've lived in my current apartment for more than three years, and I know that I was 300+ at the place I lived for 9 months prior to this. But I think that before that, in my duplex in Minneapolis, I was 275 at my worst. So I'll say 4 years. Four years of being 300+ pounds. And in less than three weeks, I'll rid myself of that shackle. For good.

Other than that, just a good back day today. Doing the lower back extension machine never really feels like a tough workout, but too often I hear that men get lower back pain because they've got a big gut in the front and it's too much pressure on the back. So I'm aware and make sure to give my lower back some reps every other week, just to keep it strong while I slim down my gut. Other than that, we did close-grip lat pulldowns and the t-bar row. The t-bar killed me the first time through, but after three weeks of it I'm ready to go up in weight. In fact, I'm going up in weight on several exercises. The front/side raises for my shoulders yesterday went up from 10 to 12 pounds (they're *so* hard!), and the shoulder shrugs will be going up 5 pounds next time through. So I'm gaining strength as I'm losing weight. Two very good things.

I told my mom last night that I'm down 25 pounds, and that my big goal is 150. "That's great," she said, "I recommend you lose 2 pounds a week." No dice mom. I know that's "healthy" weight loss, but percentage-wise, it's not enough. At that rate, it would take me 75 weeks to lose all the weight. And frankly, I don't have the time. I'm ready to get back out there and start living my life again, and I want to start NOW.

Today's weigh-in: 308.5

So I'm kind of an idiot from time to time.

Good God. Yesterday I start off so frickin' sweet. I'd reached my latest goal, I'd been open and totally honest with friends, and I was feeling so good. So what did I do? I gave myself a 'cheat' day. All the programs say it's okay. They all say to do it from time to time. Don't go overboard, but indulge a bit.

So I did.

For lunch I met up with some buddies of mine and went to get Chinese food. The place I go makes their portions so frigging huge! There's plenty for two in just one of the servings. But what did I do? Housed the whole thing, bonus eggroll and all the fried rice too. I'd swapped Mountain Dew for Diet Coke, though I'm not convinced that Diet pop actually curtails pounds. There's still something fishy there. But whatever. Then I had a cheese danish! And a 20oz Mountain Dew! Then a second Dew! Then a Kit-Kat! OMG!!! For dinner I reeled it back with a 350 calorie 6" sub on wheat with no mayo or oil or salt, along with a packet of sliced apples and a Coke Zero, then had 1.5 liters of water, but my lunchtime/snacktime damage had been done. This morning I'm 313.4 pounds. I know based on last week's "cheat day" that it'll drop off fast, but still. I'm an idiot. I need to remember, enjoy, don't indulge. And, if I find that I cannot just enjoy, then don't bother. Because I feel guilty eating it, then feel shitty for having eaten it, then feel like an idiot for the negative change on the scale.

Cheat days are overrated. And I'm kind of an idiot from time to time.

Suck it weekend.

After last weekend's disastrous 10 pound gain, I knew that things had to change this weekend. Like many people trying to lose weight, the weekend tends be like the change of a dealer at a blackjack table - things are going well, you're successful, you're raking in the chips and dropping the pounds, then boom! this new guy starts dealing cards and ices the table, and players start peeling off and heading for the buffet or the craps table. The schedule change, the time-shift from when meals take place, the loss of routine, whatever it is, weekends just screw me up.

And this weekend was another tuffy, as I split from work at noon on Friday and headed down to my high-school town to join up with friends for cocktails and dinner and some high-school football and rah-rahs. And it was good. Fun times. We never did make it to the football game, but it was great seeing these guys I hadn't seen in years, swapping funny stories and laughing and drinking. I ended up having way too many drinks and was in no condition to drive, so I rented a hotel room within walking distance and slept it off. I woke up in the morning feeling mostly okay, so I called up my buddy and went over there. After a couple hours of sitting on his deck, watching him and his wife pound down nails (10 in two hours!), I'd kind of decided that it was probably time to go. So I went. Got home, picked up some steamed veggies and chicken for dinner, had a beer, then called it a night and was in bed by 9:30.

But what I didn't do was eat heavy. I had a light turkey wrap for dinner on Friday, and some toast and water for breakfast on Saturday. And I also am really *really* feeling those v-squats from Friday. Especially today. Good lord.

Anyway, I just weighed in. 309.7. I'm outta the teens, into the oughts and have a fresh three-week clock that starts to get my next goal complete - to not weigh 300+ pounds. I'm down just over 25 pounds now, and down 4.8 pounds for this week.

I regret not doing this sooner, but I'm so happy that I am doing it now. I'm feeling so good, physically and emotionally. Things are looking up. :)

Legs and Wins

I had a huge leg day today - first I kicked up the elliptical to lvl 7 to keep pushing myself (I couldn't really tell the difference from lvl 6, so I assume I'll be up to lvl 8 next week). Then Dan and I switched up the leg program. We tossed out the hack squat and brought in a V-squat. Somewhat similar, though instead of at a 45° angle, you're mostly upright. The hack squat focuses on the quadricep, while the v-squat gets that muscle, the hamstring and the butt. And holy cow could I feel it. I was soaking with sweat by the time we were done with our third set. We then did leg extensions, followed by calf raises. We gave the hammys and the step up machine a rest this week, just to keep things fresh and attack the legs from different angles. I feel great right now!

For those who are just starting out, or mulling over starting up a weight-loss program, I wanted to talk a bit about my legs. Or more specifically, my knees.

Back in May/June/July, when I'd get up out of my computer chair at either home or work, I'd find myself limping. Limping because my knees were screaming at me. They were always stiff and inflexible and in pain. I distinctly remember thinking to myself, "when I see my folks at Thanksgiving, how am I going to hide this?" and didn't have an answer. It was a bit embarassing, but mostly it was a cause for concern. I didn't want another 40 or 50 years of this crap.

I didn't even realize that it was going to happen, but the elliptical machine has completely resolved that issue. Seriously, after about two weeks of 20 minutes a day for 5 days a week, my knees were back! And I didn't notice it right away, but I distinctly recall sitting in my computer chair at home, and having to go to the bathroom. I stood up and walked to the hallway, and realized halfway there that my limp was gone, that my knees didn't want to buckle and give way, and that I was getting better. It was just one of those "a-ha!" moments that felt so good. Small victories like that really help to keep the motivation going strong. Now that I'm down some 22+ pounds and can see the difference in the mirror, I don't need little things to motivate me as much. Now I'm like Michael Jordan back in the day - winning is addictive. I want to just keep winning. I don't need to read a book or a blog or watch a disc or clip or anything like that. I just want to add to my victory pile.

I want to not be 300+ pounds.

Ramblings

Sometimes I just don't have much to post. Such is the case today. Nothing terrible food-wise yesterday (a protein shake for breakfast, some sushi and fruit for lunch, a Subway club with no mayo or oil or salt on wheat bread for dinner), and a good night's rest last night, followed by another good arm day today. And I'm down another pound to 312.5. I did wake up again last night (every night for 3 or more weeks now), but I believe that it's work stress induced and nothing more than that. And my current work drama won't be resolved for awhile now, so I guess I'll just get used to waking up at 2am every night. Sweet.

So why post when I have little to say? Well, I've noticed a trend among fellow 'get fit' bloggers. They do well, then stop posting, and when they're not posting they tend to not be exercising either, and usually come back on several weeks/months later offering a mea culpa to nobody in particular, swearing that they're going to be back. I know, I've done it years ago myself. A couple times. So I journal my ongoings as I draw closer to my goal, in an attempt to keep myself focused on what I want and what I need, and to not be drawn off course.

Remember, just because you're not necessarily having success doesn't mean you can't post. Sometimes posting about your failures can be just as, if not more, inspiring. Provided that you keep going forward, it's just a nice sign to let others know that losing a battle here and there is okay provided you're still winning the war.

moving forward again

313.7 today. New best. I'm 3.8 pounds from my next goal, which is set to expire on Tuesday or Wednesday of next week, so I can't have a weekend blow up like this past one. Can't happen. Won't happen. Too important to be in the oughts, because once that's done? I'm like a stone's throw away from getting the hell out of the three hundreds. For good.

Today was chest day. In an attempt to keep things fresh and different, we didn't do the standard bench press. Instead, this time we opted for dumbbell press. Now typically our starting weight on the bench is the bar (45), plus 45 pound plates on either side. Yes, you can do more than me. No, I don't give a shit. But for the dumbbell presses, rather than divide that number in half, we just went with the 45 pounders. Oh. My. God. It wasn't that the weight was heavy (it wasn't), it was that I have all these little twitchy muscles in my arms and shoulders and chest, and I could feel them firing as I pressed the weight up, twisted the dumbbells at the top of the motion, then brought them down. They weren't working as a team. I was having control/stability issues.

Typically we tend to use machines for most of the workouts we do. And there are pluses and minuses to machines, just as there are for freeweights. The biggest plus for the machines is that they're fast. One quick flip of the pin and we have a weight change. And they isolate one muscle - you can really feel it when you're squeezing the isolated muscle. But because they isolate, all the little supporter muscles/tendons/whatever-I'm-not-a-doctor don't get worked. So when grabbing the dumbbells, these guys, that have been dormant while the big muscle has been getting stronger and building endurance, aren't ready yet.

After about three reps, I tossed the twist at the top of the motion out and just focused on control and form and stability. We went up to 50 for the second and third sets, then agreed that these were a fantastic addition and that we'd alternate weeks between bench press and dumbbell press, keeping things fresh and moving the exercises around.

I highly recommend that if you do three sets for a body part when you're working out, that at least one of the sets is a free weight set. I think that you'll see better gains in your other sets as a result, and I also know that I was sweating like a pig (do pigs sweat? isn't that why they roll in mud? to cool off?) while doing the dumbbells, so I'm getting a great workout. They just take so much longer when you're working with a partner and trying to get in the reps. But yeah, they're good.

another day on the farm

Went to bed at 10 last night. I seem to be doing that a lot lately. Funny, I used to stay up until 1 or 2, but now... I just don't feel good when I do. Of course, the alarm at 6:15 doesn't help me staying up late, but still. Though for the past three weeks I'm restless and wake up at some point during the night, look at the clock, then roll back over and zonk out again. Not too sure what's up with that, but I've always been a heavy sleeper, and I don't like this new wrinkle. (I think it's work-related stress).

315 today. Just about have that terrible Saturday behind me. Thank God. I need to choose better alternatives on the weekends. It's always been such a problem, but now it's just a straight-up issue. So I'll mark that on my calendar for this week and let you know on Monday how it goes.

Had a big back day today, complete with the t-bar rows. They're so tough! But I'm feeling good, so yay me. And I think that's it from St. Paul, MN. Not too exciting, but such is my life.