Gall Bladders and Birthday Wishes

Last week we celebrated the second birthday of my first son. He's amazing. Everything I'd want in a special little fella, and a bit more.

In reflecting on him and his time with us, I thought about his birth. It was funny... the night before I'd had horrendous pain in my gut. I'd vomit. I'd crap. I'd sweat. I'd have the chills... Just terrible. I remember standing in the shower, wishing this non-location-specific pain would subside. That I could get comfortable. But it didn't. It just stayed with me, like a bad penny. Finally I passed out, only to be woken by a phone call from my wife. Her amniotic fluid was critically-low, and the doctors would not let her leave. They were going to perform a c-section that day. My boy was on his way!

Fast forward a couple years, and I still find I'm having that pain every so often. One night in late May or early June it hits me. It was a Friday night. We were planning on dinner with the in-laws, and perhaps some games after. Of course, my wife was 9+ months pregnant with our second son, so this was NOT the time for me to get ill.

After a couple hours of agony on the couch/bed, I give up. I go to the emergency ward to get looked at. Long story short, I have gall stones, and the surgeons agree that I should have my gall bladder removed.

Wow.

This is a problem for old people and fat people, not a young guy like me! I couldn't believe it. Sometimes I still can't, but for the three perforations along the top of the rib line and the large purple scar over my belly button. I have one fewer gall bladders than I came into this world with, bringing the grand total to none.

My obesity is starting to take a real toll on my body.

Merry we go 'round.

This morning I rose from bed at 6:00am. The alarm had gone off at 5:45, but I snoozed my way to six in Samsung-approved five minute increments. My wife had already gone downstairs thirty minutes prior, feeding the baby so he wouldn't starve at daycare, and the toddler moaned his displeasure at the early morning through the baby monitor located 30 inches from my face.

Oh goody.

I'm in bad shape. Phsyically. Emotionally. Mentally.

I look at this blog and see my last post was 11 months ago. My weight then matches my weight now. Another year, wasted.

Today I went to the gym for the first time in forever. My wife insisted. I complied. I'm glad she did. It sucked, and I never want to get up this early again, and yet I am secretly looking forward to going again on Friday.

I just did the eliptical on a low setting for 20 minutes. But I got up, I made it to the gym, and I moved my body for the first time in a year. Rust is getting shook.

323.0

Missed the Gym

Today I overslept. I stayed up too late and didn't get to the gym. I felt especially bad as when I stepped onto the scale I had another weight decrease and now I'm anxious that tomorrow's weigh-in will see an up-tick. Ugh.

I've been pretty dilligent in tracking my calories on MyFitnessPal.com. It's a pretty sweet resource, and the database of foods available is pretty rad. The hardest part of tracking is when I don't have a great day; my compulsion is to not enter and avoid tracking, but really that's when I need to do it the most. It's such a weird sense of denial.

Anyway, I'm still focused. :)

322.7

Sodium is a Problem

This morning I stepped on the scale and was hit with a rude awakening. I was up 1.5 pounds.

I track my workout, calories and other nutritional facts through myfitnesspal.com, and according to that I was only off my calories by ~300. That number means I was still under 2000 for the day. I've also worked out every day this week. So, why was my scale number so far off?

Sodium.

I was over in my daily sodium by almost double.

I'd had a Subway sandwich for lunch, and wowza -- turns out that sandwich alone is too much sodium for me!

I'm going to hit the gym tonight. I'm hoping that I'm able to sweat out some of this water that I'm holding onto so that tomorrow brings a better result.

Watch the levels of sodium in your diet!

326.0

Week 2 and things are still happening

Okay, so I had a bit of a layoff on Friday (my day off training) and Saturday (I was out of town). I still saw a bit of a drop on the scale after those two days, so that's good. And it's Wednesday now and I've been losing weight every day this week, so that's good too.

My goal is to be under 300 pounds by Christmas of 2013.

I've found that goals need to be five things:
Specific (under 300 pounds)
Measurable (I can get on the scale and weigh myself)
Yours (this is my goal, not my wife's goal for me)
Time-sensitive (December 25th, 2013)
Written Down (this blog post)

I now have something to aim for. I'm intentional. I'm motivated. I'm dedicated. I will make my goal, and I'll do it NOW.

324.5

Early Wins

I have a fairly long commute to and from work each day. Twenty minutes into the drive I pass a McDonalds. Last winter I started treating myself to a breakfast sandwich/hashbrowns/soda once a week on the drive. It was a nice way to warm up on a cold Minnesota morning, and put a smile on my face.

Soon once a week became twice became daily. And my order changed too; no longer was one sandwich enough, now I was ordering two sandwiches. All-told, I was consuming somewhere around 1000 calories before I even started my workday!

Bad as that is, there's something worse. See, a hefty McDonalds trip in the morning meant that when I got to the office, I took a second trip, this time to the bathroom. And it wasn't pretty. And often I'd take two bathroom trips to take a dump during my workday.

The past three morning I've skipped my breakfast stop at McDonalds, opting instead for a fruit and yogurt parfait and a bottle of water from the health center.

I haven't had sloppy shits.

326.2

The Value of Two in a Row

This morning my alarm went off at 5:45. I'd been laying awake for five minutes prior to the breezy chime, debating the merits of turning it off before it made a sound, then rolling over.

I didn't.

I got up, zombie-walked around my room, and bumped into the door to the bathroom. I'm sure I woke my wife up, but she didn't seem to mind. Frankly, I think she was thrilled.

I'm not a morning-person. I hate mornings. I have no issues staying up late at night until 2am, but to wake up before 8am? That's my version of Hell. And yet, there I was, getting it together and getting to the gym.

I'm just at the starting line of my weight-loss, so I'm not yet able to take success from actual scale numbers yet, but when it comes to a non-scale victory I can take pride in getting up and making it to the gym two days in a row.

(no weigh-in this morning. I don't have a routine of when I'm weighing in down yet. Right away? After gym, during shower-time? At night before bed? I'll decide that later this week.)

My life is a loop.

Today is my 2nd anniversary with my wife.

Jeez... I've been trying to find a follow-up sentance, but one isn't available. Something to encapsulate my failures or how I've gained back all the weight I lost years ago. I can't. I don't even know how to write a blog post anymore. Sorry, this is going to be a messy, messy fight.

To my wife and son, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have ever let this happen. And to me... You know how hard it was the first time, and how often you've failed trying to reignite in the years since. It's time. Daily. Mornings. Time to eat this turd sandwich you've made.

Day 1 of the rest of my life.

328.8

Back from the honeymoon

Jamaica was beautiful! The wife and I had a wonderful time of it. Now we're back, and it's business time (though not business as usual!)

I put on a couple pounds while I was gone. Nothing too major -- I was actually expecting much worse. But with Weight Watchers and some light exercise I hope to keep dumping pounds and get into the 280s soon enough.

The wife and I are talking about morning workouts. Those have worked for me in the past. So has having a work out partner. This could be good. I'll be working to make something positive happen there.

Other than that, I'm still trying to adjust to being home again, and sharing my home with my wife. Things will be a bit weird for the next couple months, so it's going to be very important to keep the weight loss in front of my mind.

296.1

Mawwiage. Mawwiage is what bwings us togethew today.

Today is it -- wedding bells ring four hours from now!

I weighed in on my home scale, then went to WW and weighed in there. Down another 2.6 for a total of 6 pounds (and a star sticker). Pretty good as last night was the Groom's Dinner and I had a couple cocktails, some mashed potatos AND bread pudding for dessert. Yikes!

294.4

"And wove, twue wove, wiww fowwow you fowevah and evah… So tweasuwe youw wove..."